“Unawareness is Dangerous. Most people do not have any idea how dangerous a lack of Awareness is.” – Anna Imagination
I come from a place where the Narcissism is so bad that the Women there are slaves.
I come from a place where the Narcissism is so bad that the Men are unaware that their behavior is identical to Slave Owners.
In that place, women pray for their husbands to die and they teach this prayer to their children.
In that place, women obey so well that even the thought of not obeying and being happy about it terrifies them.
I grew up in Central New York.
These Narcissists and “Slave Owners” were not all “Bad People.” Most of them were just Unaware. That is it. They just… were Unaware. That is all it takes. That is the only requirement to fall susceptible to Silent, Secret Invisible Enslavement. You just have to be Unaware.
I have done little else, but Study Narcissism all my life.
And this is the accumulation of my Studies. It is how I was able to escape 3 of my 4 owners. Independence. Independence and fighting for your Power of Choice and your Taking Back Responsibilty is what changes it.
But there was something else I learned. That “Slave Owner” and “Slave” both have Narcissism. There are two Types of Narcissism: The “Caregiver” who hoards the Responsibilities of all others except their own. And the Damsel, who feels so “weak” that they require another to be Responsible for them. Neither takes on their own Responsibility. Both talk a lot on Responsibility and Blame.
The Caregiver often is The Mother. The “Damsel” is Stage #2 and Stage #3 of The Caregiver Stage.
Narcissism is Highly Contagious, is invisible, and behaves just like a Virus. It exists and is passed along through our words and Language. If you use the Language, you’ve got it. When you stop losing the language, you lose it and become immune. The Language attracts the right kind of Narcissist for you.
Gossip, Venting, and Complaining attracts Superhero Caregiver Narcissists.
Enabling, and “trying to help” and “offering to help,” over generosity and treating others like they are “invalid” or “incapable” attracts Damsel Narcissists.
Gossip, Venting, and Complaining Nurtures the Superhero Caregiver Narcissists around you to keep taking care of you.
Enabling, and “trying to help” and “offering to help,” over generosity and treating others like they are “invalid” or “incapable” nurtures the invalid Damsel Narcissists around you to keep asking you for more help.
There is an imbalance of Power.
An Exchange of Responsibility that has created a Codependent parasitic bond.
Narcissism is an Addiction.
It is all in the Language both are using.
The more the Superhero Caregiver Narcissist does, the more overwhelmed and stressed they feel until they “do it themselves,” which only adds more to their already full plate. The Caregiver Narcissist hoards everyone else’s Control and Power by taking on their Responsibilities.
Superhero Caregiver Narcissists are highly intolerant of other Superhero Caregiver Narcissists and they often micromanage everything.
On the outside, people view them as controlling, manipulative, condescending, and almost talking “baby talk” down to everyone. The Caregiver appears to treat everyone around them like Incompetent Children.
On the Inside, the Superhero Caregiver Narcissist is unaware that they are Addicted to Helping People or Addicted to “Saving People.” They are truly wanting to help and they have an ideal way of how things will be once everyone does what they are supposed to do because they are helping. The Superhero Caregiver truly is a warm, gentle, loving, and caring person, but… the stress of the workload and their Addiction to helping results in an “Angry Addict” side, which is what most people online describe as the Narcissist Monster.
So we’re all looking now for this “Narcissist Monster.”
The more the Damsel lets the Superhero Caregiver help them, the more “incapable” and dependent the Damsel feels. Many Damsel Narcissists start off very Independent, but when the Superhero Caregiver expresses a desire to help, the Damsel often thinks they are doing the Caregiver a favor by “letting them feel useful” by letting them help.
The Damsel loses Control and Responsibility at their decision and starts to settle in to a sudden space of “Relief” that doses them with, in most cases, a must needed respite from all their Independence. And the Superhero Caregiver, at first, is so happy to help. It looks like a win-win. But The Damsel is Addicted to Being Saved. If they are also Addicted to Saving People, then the Damsel can be both Superhero Caregiver Narcissist and Damsel Narcissist. This is exactly what Borderline Personality Disorder is. It also is Stage #2 of Both Types of Narcissism. It is when “the transition” happens from Type #1 to Type #2.
Some Superhero Caregiver Narcissists go on to help so much that they burn out and become a Damsel themselves. This is Stage #3.
So the Damsel “helps” by allowing the Superhero Caregiver all the Control. The Damsel helps by finding other Damsels who needs help. Some Damsels shut down and isolate with their Caregiver thinking, “Doing all this work makes them happy,” so they do nothing and say nothing.
Inside, the Damsel feels powerless, weak, confused, out of control, obedient, complacent, bored. The Damsel begins to spiral into Depression, anger, addiction, risky behavior because they are no longer “spending” their Energy in Choices they are not making.” The Addiction to Helping people grows in them as they seek out ways to Control something because the Superhero Superhero Caregiver does so much that they feel the need to Take Control of their own life, and “they can’t make the Superhero Caregiver unhappy.”
On the Outside, the Damsel throws adult sized Tantrums, is torn between their Independence and their severe need to Do something with their Addiction to Help. The Damsel, often can do a better job than the Superhero Caregiver because it is their life after all, but now, at this point, “The Caregiver insists” and so “The Damsel allows it,” but when the Damsel sees that the promised work isn’t done or the results aren’t what was promised (because the Superhero Caregiver has taken on too much), the Damsel becomes angry at the Addiction to Help, the Loss of Control, the lack of results, and the Disappointment all while feeling like they have lost their Freedom and their Control. Because they have.
To the Damsel, it is the Gentle and Loving, Controlling Superhero Caregiver who is the Controlling Narcissist Monster.
To the Superhero Caregiver, it is the invalid, weak, and helpless, “lazy” Damsel who demands too much who is the “Slave Owner” Narcissist Monster.
If you think you are in a Narcissist relationship, you are and also, you are the Narcissist.
Yesterday, an old friend called me and after “I’m good,” she launched into a gossip fest about all of her problems. I didn’t know what to say. She was looking for a Caregiver. Her mother was a Superhero Caregiver Narcissist. She wanted comfort, solutions, it was the only way she knew how to engage with people. She had no idea how to get these things on her own. She was Addicted to “Being Saved” and she was seeking the Addiction Rush of “Being Saved.” Had I been a Caregiver Narcissist, I would have had a painful tightness in my chest that “pained” me to not help.
I would have tried soothing her, reassuring her, problem solving for her.
But I learned the Language and now, I am immune to the Damsel Narcissist.
If you have both types of Narcissism (It is just safe to assume you do), you will need to become Immune to both types.
The “Narcissist Monster” we are all vigilantly looking out for is the Angry Addiction Side of Narcissism when the Narcissist can’t “get their fix.” But, the Narcissist Monster is only a very certain phase of Stage #2 and Stage #3 that is not Visible to anyone until Stage #2 and Stage #3, and even then, only in 3rd Person.
The Narcissist in 1st Person is always invisible to their own Narcissism regardless of Type and Stage.
Now there is a 4th Stage that isn’t Narcissism at all. What this is is the Unethical Psychopath who uses Narcissism strategically, consciously, and on purpose as part of their Unethical Agenda.
This is where Pedophiles, Serial Killers, and Criminals are and they are happy about it.
If you are trapped with a Narcissist, you may be with a True Narcissist (a very loving individual who does have a serious Addiction to Saving People or Being Saved), or with the Unethical Psychopath. Get help. If you KNOW you are SAFE and that you CAN push back against your Narcissist, then do so. USE YOUR OWN JUDGEMENT, but also, I strongly advise you get help.
If you do NOT feel SAFE to push back against the Narcissist, then DON’T and GET HELP. They can help you strategically make the moves you need to get out.
How to Push Back against a Narcissist Safely
And this is ONLY recommended at YOUR OWN DISCRETION and ONLY when and IF you feel SAFE enough to do so, but I strongly recommend you get help from a professional.
In most cases, the Narcissist is a good person who is unaware. In reality, you are dealing with an Addiction, which is a SYMPTOM to a bigger problem.
The Narcissist (Both Types), have one core Belief. “I am not loved.” The Narcissist is pursuing Love. That is it.
The Caregiver was taught that they are not loved UNLESS they are useful. More correctly, the Caregiver was taught that they are not wanted or “loved” unless they are being USED. So how much they are “used” equals how much they are loved.
The Damsel was taught that they are not loved unless they are being saved. The Damsel associates “Being Saved” with “Being Loved.” They think the “Saving” is a testament to how much that person loves them.
Both are pursuing Love. Neither are getting Love.
Talk to them. Kindly and Gently. Do not come at them in hostility. Talk to them. Tell them that you found this article and you read it and you would like to read it too. Get help. Do not make them read it. Focus on YOU reading it. This is going to be very hard for The Caregiver Narcissist who will want to “shove it down their throats” and “take your medicine” by force if necessary.
I am tempted to write a book called “The Help I am Getting For Myself and Why I Can’t Tell You About it.” In fact, I think that is going to be the Name of my Narcissist Book. And if you are in Danger and you Fear the Narcissist who enslaves you, The book will be called, “How I Can Make Myself Better For Others.” It will be the Same book, but you will be able to read it safely around the Narcissist. And… if it repels them, you will know… You are dealing with a very Dangerous Narcissist and you need to seek Professional Help.
You will go through the Stages of Grief. Shock and Awe, Adjustment Period, Awareness, Sudden “Connection” being drawn, more Shock and Awe. Anger. Grief/Depression. Then put together a plan. This is vital. You must have a plan. Neglecting the plan causes people to slide right back into old habits.
The Plan
STOP using the word NARCISSISM.
Do not use it. To use it Creates it. Instead, what you have is “Responsibility Confusion” and The Healing Garden teaches you how to resolve that.
STOP calling yourself and others Narcissists. It empowers the Narcissism in you and them when you do. STOP using The Word. When you call things by their Truth, you Identify True Problems so you can address them. “Responsibility Confusion” is what you are really dealing with. And THAT is what needs to be addressed.
Get help. The more Professional Aid you have with this, the easier it will go.
Guard your Responsibility. The Caregiver is NOT allowed to HELP. Make YOUR OWN Choices.
Guard your Responsibility. The Damsel MUST be INDEPENDENT. Make YOUR OWN Choices.
Learn the Language. The Language is Key. You can go here to get started.
The Addiction… All Addictions seek Control. Control is ONLY found in Taking Responsibility, Planning, Educating yourself on how Human Circuitry Works (Based on Power Economics and Highschool Physics), Learning, Knowledge, and CHOICE. That is it. Do that, and you will get the relief you have been seeking. Our Addiction Course is available.
Yes. That strategy works for ALL Addictions.
The Learn to DISCIPLINE your Emotions and your Subconscious Mind. Our Narcissist Course is designed to do this very thing for you in Simple steps. We use Mathematical Problem Solving with Logic to Correct the Logic Loops in your head that results in Rumination, Obsession, and Possession.
I use Strategic Ethical Manifestation (Exclusive to The Healing Garden) to end Narcissism and all Mental Illness. I cannot say how long it will take you, but mine took less than 5 months to complete, start to finish. I started mine in 17 December 2023, and by 8 May 2024, I was 100% Free of both Narcissisms and Immune.
In fact, Narcissism will make you feel Disgusted so that your System and Subconscious Mind will repel, reject, and purge all the Narcissism from your System.
ONLY FOCUS ON YOU. The MOMENT you STOP FOCUSING ON YOU, You shift back into “Responsibility Confusion” Mindset. In order to get you into Healthy Happy Mindset, you MUST FOCUS ON YOU.
THE MOMENT you think about “What About [Insert a Person]” Your mind is already In THEIR Story and you are NO LONGER in your Own Story… Hence “Responsibility Confusion.”
YOU MUST FOCUS ON YOURSELF 100% OF THE TIME.
Legion… Emotional Possession
Legion… Evil… Temptation… The Green Eyed Monster… Jealousy… The Devil… This thing has had MANY NAMES for centuries. It was so toxic and destructive that the Bible warned us heavily against it.
The Story of Job is actually what happened when God (A Jealous God) became so Possessed that, because he doubted Job’s reason for the Love in him, felt the need to “put Job through senseless trials to test that love.” And so killed Job. But hey… Job loved God in the end. (The Old Testament is supposed to be read in the 1st Person Point of View with the Reader as “God,” with “God” being a Good Shoulder Angel and “The Devil” being the Bad Shoulder Angel… It reads differently when you read it that way… It’s pretty fucking cool, actually. The New Testament is Christ’s Walkthrough on The 12 Ethics… but they were all translated over into Story Mode and Metaphor, and a lot of that stuff also was a Political Campaign against Rome, hidden in the Stories).
Love does not ever need to prove itself. And it is cruel to do so. If you “need proof” that someone loves you, then you don’t know what love is and you need to stop pursuing something that you know nothing about. Forcing others to “prove they love” you is cruel and is the widely common practice of those with Emotional Possession and Narcissism.
Emotional Possession is the Mindset or the State of Being when your Emotions Take Hold of You. As in To Possess. As in They Possess you and they are your Master.
Sound familiar?
When you suffer from Emotional Possession, you truly are not in Control, which is why you are Addicted to The Pursuit of Control. It is as if this “Invisible Master” governs you.
When you are overcoming Narcissism, when you chase or Pursue Love to “Possess” it, that is when The state of Possession occurs.
Unethical Pursuit summons the State of Emotional Possession. How ironic. That the more you seek to be a Master, the more enslaved you become. This is Narcissism. It is the Addictive Pursuit of Mastery and the De-evolution into Slavery.
This is how I came to live in a place in New York where the Narcissism was so severe that the entire region is governed by Silent Secret Invisible Slavery.
The secret to breaking free?
You have to not want Love.
But. Before you choose if you do not want love, maybe, you should first learn what Love is and how it is achieved. Where Love is, what it feels like, and where it is found. Narcissists, in many cases, are the people who have never been able to feel love.
So first, let’s learn about Love.
I Have A Message To Pass Along To You
This is a Poem-Styled Post I wrote that now, may make more sense to you…
I am starting up an Ad Campaign.
Women. Men. All. Pay attention.
Women. You cannot revolt. You cannot rise up. You must show Ethical Silence.
I know it’s hard, but there is something that you don’t know.
Human’s learn through Reciprocity, Repetition, and Mirror response.
Look at the Civil Rights Movement.
Look at the 60’s.
Look at Women’s Rights.
Now look at Woodstock.
Look at 9/11 and how we all came together.
Now women, listen up.
If we rise, then all women will rise. Once we stand in one voice, all will see and all will mirror and all will follow.
But there are places in this world where women cannot stand.
So sit.
There are places in this world where women cannot stand.
And this world is small.
We cannot fight for our Freedom.
It must be given.
Because there are places in this world where women cannot stand.
And so, I ask you to Ethical Sit. Take a Knee and wait.
Men. There is a world that women know about that men are oblivious too. It’s why women are gossipy. It’s why women are angry. It’s why women are so broken.
There is a Secret Slave Society that the majority of women are enslaved to, but it is so hidden that not even the slave owners know they are slaves.
It took me 40 years to escape mine. And the men who owned me, My father, my brothers, my boyfriends, rapists, and husbands… they had no idea that their behavior was actually Slave Mastery. But women know. That is what many of us gossip behind closed doors.
Now you may be wondering if you are. But the truth is, the Slavery is in our Language. It’s in how we speak and we forgot about it. We forgot that it is still there. So we have to change the language. We have to become aware. But most women are TERRIFIED to talk to you about this.
But I am not. I know that most of you, so many of you very much love your wives and your children and you just didn’t know.
Managing the Guilt and Shame and Remorse is a big part of this. We have the resources for you all ready to go. The Narcissist Course can help you.
Now the women cannot speak up. They cannot rise up, because if they do, more women will follow, and all will stand, but not all women are allowed to the stand. There are places in this world where the Women CANNOT stand. So the Women all must sit. They must wait for you to Free them. You must Free them.
Now you may not be a Woman. Maybe you are the Caregiver. Maybe you are the Damsel. Maybe you are LGBTQIA+, and maybe you did not Conform Obediently to Expectations.
This is not about Gender, but many people make it about Gender.
This is about POWER and the loss of Equal Footing. Being Forced to always sit at The Disadvantage.
This is about POWER and the Taking of “The Upper Hand.” Ensuring that you cannot be hurt ever again by making sure you ALWAYS HAVE the “Upper Hand” and “The Advantage.”
But Human Connection and Love only exists on Equal Footing, Maskless, and Vulnerable. There can be no other way. There is Solid Plan in place to change this. It has already begun. If you wish to Join this Movement, the Restoration of Equal Footing and Balance, Subscribe to The Healing Garden Newsletter.
Don’t make the children cry. This is Ethical Law.
Don’t make the children cry.
Our Children our Metrics of Who we Are and How We Behave.
Men, you are going to have to free the women. You are going to have to let them discover that they are free. Now that may scare you, but I have resources to help you do your best.
I have built an Ad Campaign where The Healing Garden has “Ethical Ads” that teach people how to be better parents, children, teacher, Spouses. We all want to stop hurting each other. Most of us just don’t know how.
Now I come from the Bottom. I’ve climbed for so long and for hard… and it took me 4 years to learn the language so I could give you this message. I have no money. And I need money to put this ad out there. And I need the people at the top to help me get to the right people.
This idea is just one of hundreds I have.
I am John Galt. And I have the motor. I need to speak to whoever is in charge. And please be sure they are ETHICAL. If you want to get involved, or you know someone who does, please have them contact me and Collaborate.
My Ideas will change the World.