Once there was a Student who was at the end of their Philosopher’s Journey. Her instructor had told her that day that there would be a ceremony and then — at long last — she would be recognized as a Philosopher. She was humbled and honored and also a bit sad.
The day of the Ceremony came and the Philosopher called the Former Student.
“Why so sad?” asked the Philosopher to the Former Student.
“I love being a Student,” she answered. “And also…” she pondered this last curiosity a while before answering.
“Before I became a Philosopher, I had to ask so many people about their Perspectives. I had to step into a Thousand Minds. It was there within all of those Minds, once I had gathered more than a Thousand Perspectives that I put them altogether and found The Philosopher’s Compass.”
The Former Student was sad.
“Now, when I speak to people,” I hear the same story with 12 Variations over and over and over… When I asked my fellow peers what I should do, they answered, “You may learn something from them that you didn’t know before.” But…” The Former Student felt her heart sink. She refused to say no more.
“They are not Philosophers and thus, they lack the One Thousand Perspectives, the knowledge of the Same Story with 12 Variations, and The Philosopher’s Compass that you have, and you believe “What can a Master Philosopher learn from the masses?”
The Former Student nodded.
“I can see every step of their Journey that they have taken and every step of the Journey they will take, for I too was on that same Journey. Each and every one of us is. Only the Philosopher knows that the Journey is the same. Only the Philosopher knows that this belief that “every Journey is Different” is actually the Perspective Stages of the One Single Journey, each person at various Stages of the Journey… not one of them realizing they all are at different stages of the Same Single Journey.
“Only the Philosopher knows the Path Behind. The Greatest of Philosophers also know the Path Ahead for it is written in The Universal Clock. But you cannot say any of this to the Non-Philosopher… But also… I am lonely and I wish to know them.
“So when I talk to them and I step into their Mind… they only ever want to talk about The Journey that they know very little about… But I seek to know their Identity and their Energy. The part of them they have not yet Discovered.
“I long to speak to another Identity and another Energy. I long to speak to a peer.
“I used to talk to the Non-Philosophers with that belief, that they could teach me something new… But I exhausted those lessons. And they don’t at all seem to understand this, that I am where I am because I exhausted everything that came before me. So that now, nothing behind me is new. All that is behind me is Old and Known.”
The Philosopher smiled and in that moment, the Former Student recognized the Philosopher for it was her Master, Plato.
“What do you think you are really grieving?” Plato asked.
“Relatability,” the Former Student answered. “Understanding and Sympathy so that I might have a Bond.”
“But they all think I’m seeking a Lesson… and they all advise me to “open my mind to learn from those behind me,” and that absolutely reaffirms my point… that I don’t seek a Lesson from them. How can someone with considerably lesser knowledge advise someone with substantially more knowledge? Is it even possible? Can a Student play the Advisor Role to the Philosopher with such a limited Perspective and knowledge base? I seek Relatability, Understanding, and Sympathy, and they just proved — again — that they cannot give me this. For, while I’m talking to them about Relatability, they are talking to me about how qualified they are to teach me, when I’m not at all seeking a Teacher… proving not only their lack of Understanding, but also their Ignorance and their Arrogance for they have turned my struggle around to focus on their “eptitude” and “Value to Me” making them inept at both Understanding and Teaching.”
“So what does this teach you?” Plato asked.
“That I cannot find Relatability in those who are behind me, and I need to stop looking for it there,” I said. “And when they tell me about their adventures and discoveries… It reminds me of when I — nearly 30 years ago — was on that adventure. And I feel Old. I feel so very, very old… Like I’m watching a child discover a butterfly for the first time… And more than ever I feel no Relatability at all. And this makes me sadder and then angrier.
“Then they try and advise me to “open my mind to learn from those behind me.” And I get sadder and angrier… I am not at all Understood by them.”
The Former Student felt her heart sink lower than low.
“You have chosen a path no one has walked before you,” Plato said. “This loneliness you feel is part of the Journey.”
The Former Student recalled “The Loneliness Trial” that overshadowed her Pilgrimage. Only then did she finally understand why.
“You seek the Companion in those multiple Skill Levels below you because you have no Companion at your side,” said Plato. “And you still deny The Loneliness Trial… which is why you’re writing to me,” he said. “Because you already have realized… you have no one else.”
“When I go to those behind me… many of them get mad at me, threatened, and offended…”
“Like a Teacher who has come to play with the Students who is not one of them,” Plato said.
“And then I show up as I am, which is The Way, and they accuse me of being Arrogant and Conceited, when in fact, I am just… Ahead of them… And my Energy is just too…”
“If you’re going to play with the Children, then you must assume the role of the Child and stand equal to them,” Plato said.
“But that isn’t who I am,” I said. “I can’t meet them at their Level for that is not who I am. To show up any less than As I Am, is to show up inauthentic wearing a Mask.”
Plato gave me that look he gives me when he knows I can draw the Conclusion.
“I have to give up looking for a Peer behind me.”
Plato nodded. “Exactly.”
“And to do that, I have to accept my Loneliness and finish the Trial.” My heart sank. I remembered the Tarot Reading that was pulled the other day. High Priestess with Queen of Cups, Queen of Wands, Queen of Swords, Queen of Pentacles and the Empress Card.
“You have to Know who you are and Claim it,” I said. “You have to Own who you Are and Stand in your Power, but to all others behind me in this Journey… they view this Stage of Authority and Knowing — Self Ownership… The World has no idea — as Arrogance. They mistake this Stage of Authority and Power as Conceit… But it is the Greatest Stage of Knowing where Confidence, Self-Authority, and Authenticity all come together.”
“This is your Captain’s Seat,” Plato then said.
“There is no Relatability with it,” I said.
“When did you drop the 3rd Person Point of View and why?” Plato asked.
“When I realized there was no purpose or need in hiding who this conversation was really about,” I said. “When I realized that I had no peers and wouldn’t. This is the Price of my Goal.”
“Which is?”
“To know everything.”
“You Dream An Impossible Dream,” Plato said.
I grinned wide and brighter than ever before. “You got that right.”
To dream the impossible dreamTo fight the unbeatable foeTo bear with unbearable sorrowAnd to run where the brave dare not goTo right the unrightable wrongAnd to love pure and chaste from afarTo try when your arms are too wearyTo reach the unreachable starThis is my questTo follow that starNo matter how hopelessNo matter how farTo fight for the rightWithout question or pauseTo be willing to march into HellFor that Heavenly causeAnd I know if I’ll only be trueTo this glorious questThat my heart will lie peaceful and calmWhen I’m laid to my restAnd the world will be better for thisThat one man, scorned and covered with scarsStill strove with his last ounce of courageTo reach the unreachable star
“You understand now,” Plato said to me.
I nodded.
“How many times did you listen to this song, sing this song? How many times did you commit your heart and your life to it? Did you really think — knowing your powers of Manifestation — Your Dedication to Truth and Knowledge, that you could sing this song as much as you did and not embed it so completely into your Soul?”
“I understand too well the Madness of Don Quixote,” I said. “It wasn’t Madness at all.”
“What was it?” Plato asked of me.
“When life itself seems lunatic, who knows where madness lies?… Too much sanity may be madness, and maddest of all is to see life as it is and not as it should be.” – Cervantes
“He refused to live life any less than Life as it should be. And only one who Commits to that Standard understands… knows exactly what kind of Life that will require of you.”
At long last, I was finally understanding my True Loneliness and my Trial.
I sat down at the Fountain, deciding at last that I stood with Plato at the Garden Fountain in the middle of my Garden.
“What did Shakespeare say? What dreams may come?” Plato asked.
“To sleep, perchance to dream: ay, there’s the rub; For in that sleep of death what dreams may come When we have shuffled off this mortal coil must give us pause.”
“Hamlet,” I added.
“You are an Ashavana, Anna,” Plato then said to me. “You — and you alone — know what that means.”
“It’s the Archetype of the Philosopher, which is, in truth, Don Quixote’s Quest, a Knighthood dedicated to The Knowledge, the Wisdom, and the Ethics that you are sworn to pass on to the next Generation…”
“Yours is the Life of the Torch Bearer of Truth,” Plato said.
I nodded. That is exactly what this is.
“So when I talk to people,” I said. “I am gathering pieces of their sliver of visible Truth… Too many have their backs turned to it. Many are concerned with Red Herrings, having no idea that they chase Lies that draw them away from Truth. Too many Manufacture Lies, unaware that their Ideas violate the Logic, the Truth, and the Love…”
The more I spoke, the more I was understanding. The words navigated me through the Logic, building my Path of Comprehension through my Trial. More Truth was visible now. I could see the light now.
“And no one else is on this path, though there are many who desire it. They see it. They crave it,” Plato said.
“I feel myself, often, pulled toward the Paths of others and this frustrates me. I take my eyes off my Path and I look to another to see how they are doing it… Thinking maybe I could learn something from them… and I — at once — feel myself start to mimic them and instantly I know — for me and my Quest — it is wrong.” I smiled. “I have a Quest.”
I released a sigh and thought long and hard on this. “Through Truth and Logic, Love and the Ethics, I found Nature’s Path and her Formula for all things. Everything in this world that is ethically right and Mathematically Correct is aligned with this one Formula. Everything that is ethically wrong and Mathematically incorrect is an alteration from this one Formula.
“And after finding this Formula, no matter what, I cannot take my eyes from it. Nothing in that moment works for me when I do. Not even to tell others that they have the wrong formula. So then how am I to spread the Truth of Zarathustra and Mother Nature when I can’t even take my eyes off of the Formula for even a moment to speak? I think of this question often. And no matter what I do, how I try, where I go, I must keep my head down, my eyes on the Quest, and I just… must go. And I hope… somehow… they will find me.”
And just like that, suddenly, I understand.
“When I look to those behind me to look for Relatability among those who are Perspectives behind me, still living in the Singular — I turn my back to my Quest.”
“Exactly,” Plato said.
“I see.”
I smiled warmly, remembering all the times I read The Dialogues of Plato. So many people pondered if Socrates every lived… I understand too well why Plato wrote about Socrates. It was the same reason that I, right now, was writing to Plato.
Here I was, 2,000 years later, continuing the Discussion he started.
“It’s a Lonely Quest,” I said.
He nodded. “It is.”
I thought then of DaVinci… “There is this movie, “Ever After” with Drew Barrymore who plays Cinderella. And instead of mice and birds, Cinderella has DaVinci to talk to. I think of that movie… EVERY DAY. And in the end, when they lock up Cinderella, the peasants run to DaVinci who uses Physics to remove the door hinges and thus, the door itself.
And the Peasant who is uneducated says, “You’re a Genius!” to which DaVinci replies, “Yes. I am going to go down in history as the Man Who Opened A Door!” And I think that is the FUNNIEST LINE IN ALL OF MOVIES THAT EVER WAS!”
I related so much to him. How primitive the 15th Century must have felt for he and Cervantes and Shakespeare. I get it. I absolutely understand.”
Energy never dies. It is only ever Transferred or Stored.
And just like that… Quite suddenly, I felt so very, very much Understood, relatable, and so very much not at all alone.