What a Healthy 3rd Ethical Perspective Looks Like : 

The Healthy 3rd Ethic is between the ages of 2 and 4. They are INDEPENDENT, Confident, BOSSY, and they love the word “NO!” This is GOOD. They are learning how to set BOUNDARIES.

Respect their “No.”

They will juggle themselves between Self-Nourishment and Alone time (1st Ethic) and Adventures with Lord of The Flies. LET THEM. They have learned Trust, Self Love, Self-Nourishment, Vulnerability, Courage, Boredom, and Belonging. They have learned Self-Authority. Now, they are practicing “Self Boundaries” and “Self-Rules.”

The Trial of The 3rd Ethic

To Learn and accept the Limitations of the Self and to Ask for Help, Trust Others, and Trust themselves.

The Value of The 3rd Ethic

Independence. Self-Reliability.

What a Traumatized 3rd Ethical Perspective Looks Like :

These people do not trust. Anyone. Ever. They think only “What’s in it for me.” They only think of “I.”

Because they never learned how to Trust, they lack Belonging, they lack Resources, and they lack Family. They were forced to be too Independent too soon. They Learned Self-Authority, but at the expense of Love and Belonging. 

They are Republicans, which is why they can’t think outside of “I.” They are still looking for Belonging. 

“Republican” used to mean “For the People,” but then it became “WIFM” and “Why should I help you?” They struggle thinking about others because — and life has very much proven to them — no one ever thinks about them and “If I don’t think about me then no one will.”

They truly believe they are not worthy of love, “And I’m okay with that!” No… they are not. But that is the lie they have to tell themselves every day just so they can function.

What Happened?

They were most likely forced to “Man Up!” Mostly, Toxic Masculinity happened to them. This is where a LOT of White Men were bullied into being by Abusive Fathers.

Mothers were most likely Obedient 2nd Ethics who just survived the Abusive Father.

At a very young age, these are the people who were NOT allowed to say “No,” but who said it anyway and who were beaten for it. They were Beaten for their Boundaries. But they stayed Loyal to themselves through it all.

Symptoms?

• Narcissism, Stage #3
• Trust issues
• Possibly Addictions 
• Self-Loathing

How to fix this if it’s you?

You need to admit to yourself that you need help. But I know 3rd Ethics. You’re not even here reading this… Not until the world has heard all about this… For you are the last to hold out. Being here to read this will cost you your Vulnerability, which you convinced yourself is “Weakness.”

Because you learned a long time ago that “Weakness” or anything less than “The Upper Hand” will get you beat. So you live in Self-Preservation Mode where you are always looking to get, secure, and hold The Upper Hand.

The only cure to this is Humility, surrendering of The Upper Hand and Humble submission to learn. But no. You won’t ever do that. Your self-Preservation comes first.

And that’s okay. You will be the last in this world to heal and come over to the Union. And that’s okay. When that time comes, we will forgive you. You will then learn that it is safe to be Vulnerable. 

“Fuck that shit!” you will say to that. And that’s okay. This is how it will happen. We will wait for you until the very end because you too, you beautiful 3rd Perspective, you are so loved. 

How to fix this if it’s a Loved One?

Love them. Forgive them. Set a Boundary and protect yourself. Forgive them. Do not judge them. And love them. They have seen the least amount of Love in this world and these are the people who do not believe it even exists.

Support them. Stand by them. And — keeping yourself Safe — Follow The 12 Ethics to keep you Safe and also to heal them. 

They need to see a Love so deep and true that it breaks through their Cold Hate, and their Self-Preservation finally, at long last, shuts off. 

These are the people who live with their Self-Preservation permanently on. They don’t know how to turn it off.