Many of us subscribed to this Handbook. Many of us were told “this is love.”

It has taken me a life time and hell to sort out this mess.

There are two Handbooks of Love out there. In order to know which one you are dealing with, you have to Master Narcissist Love (which is not Love at all) and True Love.

I was born and raised in a Family without anything I could call “Love.”

By 4 years old, I was asking “what is love?” and no one could give me the same answer… for 40 years.

In Mathematics, it is proven that when we know something, everyone has the same answer, which is Unanimous.

Like “Triangle.” We all are 100% in agreement of what a Triangle is. We don’t argue this. We don’t debate it. It is not a Discussion.

Discussion is something we do in Trial and Error when we are trying to figure things out.

No one is having a discussion about what a Triangle is.

We have a Word. That Word is 100% DEFINED. That Definition is simple, clear, and KNOWN. The Discussion is over.

The next example in this is Flat Earthist. We KNOW. We have an answer. The evidence is substantial that the Earth is Roundish. The only people who are discussing this are Flat Earthists and Round Earthists who get entertainment in arguing with Flat Earthists.

Aside from the Entertainment Troupe and the Flat Earthists, NO ONE is having this Discussion. Mostly, we are all talking about how incredibly ignorant and illogical the Flat Earthists are.

When I set out to figure out what Love is and what it is not, I noticed two Groups — Two very distinct Groups — that could be broken down quite easily into True Love Group and Narcissist “Love” Group.

Narcissists know nothing about Love.

But that is where most of use went to school.

I spent nearly 8 years dissecting Narcissism right down to identifying their Unique Language and learning it. Then inventing another, Narcissist-Free Language so I could stop attracting Narcissists.

Within 3 months, I had a new Language — Abstractic — which repelled Narcissists. I was able to use this Language to identify the Stages of Narcissism and to clean out my Inner Circle so I no longer had to protect myself.

The War ended. Conflict came to an end. Abuse ended. My Confidence skyrocketed. I could finally relax and ease into a stable life free of assault, conflict, abuse, and manipulation.

The best part came when, after a few months of Narcissist-Free living, I was exposed to a brief conversation with one and I heard it instantly. The “You” statements. The blame. The amplified Self-Victimization/Self-Glorification. The combativeness. The Verbal Defense and Logical Warfare.

I walked away.

Over the next two years, I began logging, interviewing, watching, observing, and tracking the Common Denominators of Narcissist Love and True Love that separated these two things.

True Love :

• Did not give up
• Solved problems with Love
• Prioritized The Safety and Care of the other person with Love
• Focused on Forgiveness. Never Vengeance.
• Nourished The Self

Narcissist “Not-Love” :

• Quits on Love and their Loved Ones regularly and is the “go to” response
• Never Solved Problems. Blamed instead.
• Sacrificed the Safety of Others for The Self
• Prioritized The Self at the Expense of Others
• Focused on Revenge and not Forgiveness
• Tracked the Karma
• Neglected The Self

This was made very clear to me : Love for Others and Self Love were absolutely inseparable so much so that they were very much The Same Thing.

The biggest “tell” between these two Groups was “Abandon and Throw people away” <– Narcissism vs. “You hold on and don’t let go, no matter what.” <– True Love.

But this “Abandon People” and “Throw them away to save yourself” Mentality always came with a plethora of “Love Advise” that nourished this “Abandon Others” mindset.

That is when I noticed a lot of Good People quoting from the Narcissist Handbook Of Love. Without their even knowing it, they were practicing Narcissism on a regular basis.

If you hate your Self, you project that hate onto others. If you Love your Self, you project that love onto others. Love of Others and Self Love are the same thing. The sooner we all learn that, the healthier this World will become.