Now that you have admitted and accepted that you were abused because YOU made poor choice and/or you allowed the abuser inside your head to rip out your Logic, you need to go back to the 4th Ethic and amend your Self-Law, Self-Rules, and Boundaries.
Boundaries :
How close should I allow someone before I trust them?
How long should I assess someone before I trust them?
What tests should I use to determine if I can trust someone?
Did I trust someone too soon?
At what point did I trust my Abuser too soon?
At what point did I fail to assess my Abuser at all?
At what point did I allow my Abuser access to me?
Note:
“I was a child.”
Well, then… You WERE a child. This WAS not your fault. They are really fucked up. And you now know who they really are. And you DON’T and WON’T allow them access to you anymore.
Rules :
I am going to create “red flags” that tell me when someone is Toxic.
I am going to look for 3 Red Flags when I meet someone knew.
I am going to learn how Abusers talk so I can find their Red Flags.
I am going to raise my standards so I can see when someone is toxic around me.
I am going to DENY ACCESS to people who are not good for me.
I am not going to allow Gossip around me.
If someone shows Red Flags, I will NOT give them a warning or tell them to stop. I WILL LEAVE and REMOVE MYSELF from the situation.
See the difference?